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There is no X in Espresso

"I'll have a double espresso, con panna."

I get the look of confusion. So, I revise. I dummy it down for her and repeat my order, "I'll have two shots of espresso topped with whip cream."

She twirls her green apron ties the way I once twirled my hair (when it was long and I was young). "Just eXpresso?"

I inhale s-l-o-w-l-y. I have not yet had my coffee. I am here because I am in a strange city that does not have a Peet's Coffee & Tea. Focus, Lisa. Focus on the most important issue first: your coffee. "Two shots, espresso, (emphasis on the letters 's') and a dollop of whip cream." I know she's about to ask, A dollop? What's a dollop? I quickly add, "The barista will understand." Of this I am sure.

"Your name?"

Today is not a Julio day. I say my name, but pronounce the "s" in Lisa with a zesty "z" sound. I hand her my money. She hands me back a few coins. I do not immediately drop them into the wide mouth jar. I haven't decided yet if a tip is deserved. I pause, and, then, just before the coins fall from my not-so-relaxed palm, I inform her, "There is no X in espresso."

Like I said, I haven't had my coffee yet. Fortunately, I do not have to wait long before I hear the barista call out, "LiSa? Double eSpreSSo with whip." Emphasis on the letters 's'.

Comments (3)

Man I don't want to Zee you in the morning pre-coffee.

That's hilarious. I use "Starbucks names" myself but have been remiss and haven't posted them yet... soon, I hope.

Anonymous:

Thought you might be interested in the new documentary about the Starbucks guy: http://www.freeindie.com/2007/03/starbucking.html

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